Our son, John, was a handsome man. Bright, talented, gifted, sensitive, caring with a wonderful sense of humor. He died three weeks ago today. We don't even know what drug it was that killed him. He was 26, and had been using for 10 years. Started out casually smoking weed along with teenage drinking and went on from there. He did a stint in rehab and $20,000. later it didn't help and we were out of money for any future rehabs. There are a lot of rehabs out there but you better be rich. They are not cheap and aren't always what they are cracked up to be. As a parent who knows from experience, programs offer a lot but they don't always fix the problem. And if your child doesn't want your help or they don't think their problem is as "big of a problem" as you do, there is nothing you can do. You might have a chance if they're under 18, but not necessarily. I don't mean to be pessimistic, but this is what we experienced. We went through the "what did we do wrong" phase. I think it is perfectly normal to ask that question, more out of frustration. You want so badly to help your child, you hate to watch what they are doing to themselves. You are so afraid of what the future might bring or not bring that you don't know what to do and you just start asking, "what did we do wrong." Unless you are a parent, you will never understand that stage of grief that you are experiencing watching your child destroy themselves and any chance of a bright future. It's natural to wonder. I don't even know why I'm writing here . . . Pray, pray and don't stop praying because I think that is all the control you have. The only bright light that came from this very sad, undescribable pain we are in is our son left us a beautiful son to raise.