oh wow - I read your comments and the youngster Josh who has received much negativity in response. My story is so much like yours - I feel i must pay cognicance to Josh though- I never thought these "ways"" to be controlling - just wanting the very best for my children, trying to help them and make the road easier - maybe even to protect them from the baddies. I dont know. Josh the moment your baby is put in your arms, you get this overwhelming desire to protect them from anything and everything - I know this sounds cliche - but only a parent will understand this - you can only understand the depth of love for a child - when that baby is put in your arms, given to you to nurture - I certainly didnt until my first child was born. The love you immediately feel is so strong and so compelling you cannot explain it. You will instantly give your own life to protect him/her. You only want the very best. There are no books - no guidelines, children dont come with a any manuals, we learn by trial and error and pray that the errors are not bad, but we love - we never stop loving - a love so deep - I am in the same boat as you Mr Crandall - I feel like my whole insides have been torn out - Im told to leave my boy - he has to want this, but right now he doesnt, but how can I leave him, how can I and yes Josh I want to control - I want to take him and hold him and make him understand but he doesnt want to- I feel like I want to tie him to a bed or something - until my real boy returns - so that no harm can come of him, in the meantime _ I feel sure my real boy is there. But I dont want to be that drastic - so Josh - you can help parents here - help us get into the minds of our addicts so we can find the real way to help them, what will help them respond - help me to get my boy back please