It had been one of those mornings.  The sky was an angry sort of grey and the rain pounded down on the roof, mercilessly.  I'd had trouble sleeping the night before and my significant other had an early appointment at a government office.  It doesn't matter which one, just that she was facing up to a couple of hours of dealing with bureaucrats who were trying to separate her from her money.  With the little lady already on edge, I'd gone and absentmindedly wiped avocado on the kitchen hand towels that aren't really for wiping your hands on, you know the ones.  To make matters worse, I then half-heartedly tossed the "decorative pillows" on the bed in a manner that could easily be (mis?)co

Funny People Directed by Judd Apatow & The Hurt Locker Directed by Kathryn Bigelow By Tony Sheppard Capitol Weekly At first sight, these two movies seem to have little in common, but watching them back-to-back while trying to catch up with the summer’s offerings reveals interesting similarities. “Funny People” is the latest from the Judd Apatow machine (‘The 40 Year SuperKnocked Dewey Zohan Step Talladega Express’ or something like that) while “The Hurt Locker” is from Kathryn Bigelow, a dudette who makes movies for dudes (“K-19: The Widowmaker” & “Point Break”). While I’m on the topic of “Point Break” does anybody know what the dudest of dudes Keanu Reeves was doing in town last week?

We’ve all heard the phrase:  “Some things are better left unsaid”.  However, there are times when we need to say things.  Sometimes conversations become crucial, and have life or death stakes. I interviewed Desiree Aragon Nielson, Learning and Development Professional at Catholic Healthcare West / Mercy in Sacramento.  Desiree has been certified in teaching “Crucial Conversations”, a best selling book (McGraw Hill) based on extensive research.  She trains employees in her health care setting, noting that “In health care, it is life and death …we appreciate crucial conversations as a tool”.  1) What are Crucial Conversations?  Based on the authors’ extensive research, Desiree says “three

According to the April 2009 edition of the Harvard Business Review, toxic behavior in the workplace significantly decreases work effort, quality, morale and commitment. We are seeing more toxic behavior at work as a result of more negative emotions associated with the recession.  So, it's important we take some time to look at this issue. Joining me on the next episode of “Good Work NOW!” is leadership consultant Steve Sphar. Steve and I discuss toxic behavior – what it is and why it’s important to address, explore some interesting insights about perception and demonstrate a four step process that anyone can use to make a positive difference. Steve defines toxic behavior as “a type of be

“I’ll have my people call your people.” Have you ever known someone who could get anything done because he had all the right contacts? The wheelers and dealers of the business world know all about this. They build networks of people to get results and solve problems. They are good at what they do for their companies, but the art of networking is not something exclusive to commerce – it is useful for neighborhoods too. Finding allies for our tracts who will help foster community and reinforce the change we are working toward is critical for success. Thankfully there are a plethora of potential partners for neighborhood growth and it’s just a matter of tapping into relationship with some of

It’s nearly impossible to win with only one great player. Even megastar athletes like LeBron James, Kobe Bryant, and Tom Brady have all needed good players around them to succeed. The same is true in our neighborhoods. Experiencing a more vibrant community requires a sense of teamwork that bonds residents together and goes beyond unrelated efforts by a few individuals. Finding like-minded people who want to help your neighborhood become more connected is the key in getting things started. How do you begin to piece together a team for the neighborhood? There is no exact science toward discovering the right people, but below are some principles to begin with. Pick and choose what will work

Fred had a big problem. He and his next door neighbor were in the habit of heated arguments, squirting each other with the water hose, and even on the verge of fist fights. These two men despised each other. Fred was in the thick of a worst-case scenario situation where moving to another neighborhood seemed inevitable. He clearly had some issues to work on, but the real question I wonder about was what his three daughters were learning from their Dad as they watched his belligerence toward the man next door. What type of neighbor do you want your children to be one day? What are your hopes for them when they plant their roots in a community? It’s easy to think of our children’s success i

I recently attended a funeral of a local man. He raised four kids, stayed married for fifty years, knew success in his career, and had many remarkable traits. His eulogy was full of all the great stuff we often hear, but there was something more mentioned that was a very high compliment: he was a good neighbor. Story after story was shared about how he was known to say hi to others, pay attention to people around him, find ways to care for folks next door, talk to passersby, befriend local teenagers, and even share his roses and vegetables with neighbors. The notion of being a contributor to the health of a community is seldom on the radar in today’s society. Somewhere along the way we lo

Improving a neighborhood can feel like trying to resurrect the Titanic, but in reality it’s more like flipping a burger with a family next door. When our prime focus is only on the problems in a community, it can start to feel discouraging and we give up, thinking “I don’t have the time or energy,” or “I can’t do this by myself”, or “I don’t even know where to begin.” I’d like to suggest though that the beginning point for strengthening a neighborhood is really about small every day choices rather than planning big events or programs. Strengthening a community simply recognizes that relationships rather than high fences are what is most important. The truth is you do not need ample time,

Not long ago on a Friday I drove home after a long and tiring week of work and found my neighbor Queen bringing in my trashcans. While getting out of my truck Queen grinned sheepishly and told me I was not supposed to catch her in the act. This was a small deed of kindness on her part, but I gave her a big hug and thanked her for making my day. In essence what made this act so meaningful was that my neighbor stepped outside of the confines of her parcel lines into a “front yard dynamic” where we could connect over something so simple. Had she not dragged in my trashcans, I would have just done it myself. But since she took the initiative to do something thoughtful for my family, an opport

One of the constant themes that Home Depot commercials hit on is the idea of building the ultimate backyard. Have you seen these ones? A family turns their typical rear plot of land into a haven full of Trex decking, bright flowers and fresh sod, with a gleaming stainless steel grill to bring it all together. The concept is to create a space to relax—a refuge from the rest of the world and a post-5pm retreat after a tiring day. I’ll admit that these ads strike me in two ways. One, I want that backyard. But Two, on a deeper level I wonder if there is something here for us to consider. Has our society become used to a world where we spend the bulk of our time confined to our parcel lines wh