It is February. The month of love. The month of loneliness. Pretty much everyone falls into one of those categories, but I want to remind you that single does not mean alone. Make a point to connect with a friend this Valentine's Day. After all, love is not just intimate, but a feeling we have for people who matter to us. Reach out and schedule coffee, dinner, or a fun night in. Forget gifts. They don't matter in the face of time spent together. Don't get depressed about being alone, but remember to be thankful for what you have, for who you have. Write a love letter to yourself. Remind yourself who you are and what makes you thrive. Make a list of things you have done and things you h

Q: My mother is in the last stages of aggressive cancer, bedridden and nearly comatose from the pain medication. We haven't always had a good relationship (actually we have never had a good relationship), but the thought of losing her makes me realize how much I really do love her. I know she has sacrificed a lot for me in her life, and now I feel like I lost out on something special, a relationship with her. I am having a really hard time coping with her dying and us never having the chance to talk about this. My brother tells me that I just need to let it go and not bog her down with my feelings. I don't know what to do. A: I am really sorry to hear about your mom and the pain she is e

Maybe it is just me, but I am so thankful that Facebook was not around when I was in high school. The drama that it can cause is ridiculous. Even people in their late 20s and 30s succumb to the drama Facebook provides. "You checked in at where with who? I thought you were home sick! You told me you don't even like that girl. Liar. We're through!" "I get so mad at all those girls who comment of my boyfriend's wall. Don't they know we're together now?" "Who is that guy who always ‘likes’ your photos and comments? Do I need to pay him a visit?" "Why are you still friends with your ex? Now he can see everything we do!" Please raise your hand if you have been a part of or heard of situatio

Q: Just like everyone else I know, I made certain new year’s resolutions that revolve around bettering the person I am. I was really excited about some of the changes I was going to make. Now, a week later, I get the impression my boyfriend isn't as excited about the changes. They don't really have anything to do with him, except I am changing the person I am, and he doesn't like that. We have only been together a year, and I am uncertain about our future. However, I am not willing to give up these amazing changes I am making just for him. Am I making the wrong decision by blowing off his feelings? A: In this situation, there are a couple things you need to consider about him and about

Are you among the millions who made a New Year’s resolution or resolutions under the title of self-improvement? A new diet, a new job or a new outlook on life in your future? Research shows that more than 100 million Americans make resolutions every January but only one out of five actually stick with it. Good for those 20 million people. For the rest of us, consider the resolutions you have made in the past. Did you stick to them? Why not? (Yes, I AM assuming you didn't.) I can only imagine that you set out to change your life. You planned on losing 25 pounds, finally snagging that job you always wanted, and you planned to quit smoking. All. In. One. Year. I mean, since those things a

“Real Relationships” will be taking a two-week hiatus for the holidays. I will be back to dish both solicited and unsolicited relationship advice on Monday, Jan. 2. Email your questions to sacpress@live.com.  Questions will be featured and answered anonymously. Have a merry Christmas and a happy new year! ~Janna  

The holiday season is typically full of fun and festivities: work parties, family get-togethers, nights out with friends, and don't forget all the shopping! It is during this time of year that I find myself busy, tired and lacking in a little personal time. Don't get me wrong — I love the holidays, the parties, the decorations and all of it, but sometimes I get tired. The scheduling, the invitations and the cleaning followed by the cooking, shopping and general daily life are a lot! I feel like I always get sick shortly after New Years because my body just says, "Enough already." The solution: There isn't one. However, don't forget about yourself in the midst of all the fun. No, I am not

Q: I am a struggling college student with more bills than income. Christmas is always a struggle for me because I don't have the funds I want to dedicate to present-buying. My family completely understands this, and we often choose names to limit the number of people you must buy a present for. However, my boyfriend’s family (we have been together several years) does not do that, and they are known for their extravagant gift-giving. The past few years that I have participated in their family Christmas, I typically end up over-extending myself on the gifts and putting more than I want to on my credit card. This year I don't want to do that, but it is embarrassing to show up with cheap gif

Instead of question-and-answer this week, I am writing a little editorial about spending the holidays with immediate and extended family. For most people, this season is one of the few times a year we see many members of our extended family. Different interests and personalities collide in what turns out to be a magnificent display of diversity, or a horrific explosion of arguing and hurt feelings. What kind of family do you have? If your family comes together in a harmonious fashion and shares fun, laughter and love, then you are a very blessed person. Remind yourself how thankful you ought to be for the people you love, who love and care about you. If your family falls into the other

Q: My husband and I recently had a baby (five months ago), and now I am looking to go back to work full time. I have looked in to the cost of care for our son, but the prices are outrageous. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law has offered to care for our son every day that I am working. While this seems like a perfect and inexpensive solution, I am not wild about how my mother-in-law handles my son. My husband and I have a very particular way we handle our son, and my mother-in-law doesn't always follow our directions when she watches him. I am afraid that without consistency he will be confused as he grows older about what is and is not right, what he can get away with, and he will waiver from t

Q: I am in an abusive relationship. It isn't ALL the time, but it does happen sometimes. I know the obvious answer would be to break up with him and leave, but I don't really feel like it is that simple. On one hand, he has made references to being really angry if I ever leave him. On the other hand, we do have a good relationship most of the time. I dream of being in a happy relationship, but I don't know how to create one. You know that saying, "I have come too far to go back now"? That is how I feel. I don't know if I will ever have the courage to stand up for myself and walk away. A: Let me just first say that you have never gone too far to walk away from someone who does not respe

Q: I have a very good friend who doesn't seem to understand the need for confidentiality. It isn't that I am a secretive person, but sometimes when you tell people things, especially close friends, you don't want them to go spread the word. This girl is a very close friend of mine, but I find myself hesitating to share anything secretive or confidential with her because she might bring it up to someone else. I know she isn't meaning to make me uncomfortable or embarrassed, but she does. I guess I feel like our friendship will never be what I want it to be because I can't trust her or confide in her. Should I say something to her or just never tell her anything I don't want retold? A: We

Q: I just found out I am pregnant. I told my boyfriend and we both agreed that we are not ready to be parents, but there is no way I would consider getting an abortion. I know that I could put the child up for adoption, but I feel like that is going to be really hard after carrying to term. However, I know I am not ready to be a mother, and I don't want to lose my boyfriend over this. I don't really know what to do. A: Wow. You have many hard decisions and a long road ahead of you. First of all, I applaud your stand on keeping the baby to term even though you are not sure about what will happen after that. Secondly, I would suggest that you do not make a rash and uneducated decision ab

Q: I am getting married in six months. I asked my three best friends and my sister to be in my wedding. Fortunately, I could make my sister my maid of honor so that I didn't have to deal with friend drama and jealousy. Unfortunately, I am still dealing with drama with my friends. One in particular has not been the ideal bridesmaid. She is extremely opinionated about everything I choose for my wedding, particularly the dresses, and, frankly, it is more of a headache to deal with her than I am interested in. She has been my friend forever, but I am two minutes away from telling her she can just come as a guest. What do I do? A: There is really only one course of action here. She can put up

Q: My 7-year-old daughter is dealing with a bully at school. She comes home almost daily and relates stories about how another girl in her class makes fun of her. Apparently she is making fun of her clothes, the words she uses, her school work... anything she can think of. I have always thought my little girl was pretty outgoing and strong, but lately she seems to be breaking under the weight of the bullying. I have given her all the pep talks I can think of (kill her with kindness, avoid her at all costs, and compliment her when she bullies you). Nothing has changed and I feel like I need to step in on a more parental level, but I don't know where to start. A: I am sorry for the trouble

Q: I am so frustrated by the office dynamics at my job. I try to be a nice person while still maintaining some level of authority and end up getting disrespected by some of my coworkers. I don't want to worsen the problem by making a big deal about it, but it makes for a tense environment every day and I hate it. I don't know what my next step is! A: Though not uncommon, this situation makes it hard to keep up a team attitude and a positive working environment, which is essential. Though I do not know the specifics of your particular situation, I would recommend that you attempt the following: 1. If there are a few particular people who appear to be the problem, speak with them personall

Q: I have recently taken up writing as a new hobby. I am not really sure if you would call it a hobby — it is more of a passion that I have always had but have never really explored, but now I am really getting into it. Problem is, my boyfriend is not really supportive. I guess it is because I have been spending a lot of time with my head bent over notebooks or pecking away on the computer and not as much time with him. I don't want to hurt his feelings or make him think he isn't important to me, but I really feel I need to nourish this growing need until I am more comfortable with it, and then I can settle into a routine. Is that unfair to him? A: Well, it is going to be hard for me, as

Q: Let me preface this by saying I am not a catty or jealous girl. However, my husband has begun hanging out semi-regularly with a few of his female co-workers that have been his friends for several years (some before I was in the picture), and it makes me a little uncomfortable. First of all, he never invites me, which is odd, and secondly they are flirty and suggestive when they are around him, and I don't like it. Although some of them are single, a few are married, and I wonder how it makes their husbands feel! How do I let him know the situation makes me uncomfortable without seeming like I am just attacking his female friends? A: First of all, let me just say that this situation s

Q: I know when you are in a committed relationship you are not supposed to keep anything from each other. Furthermore, you are never supposed to lie to each other about anything. There has to be an exception to this rule when you are keeping something from your significant other that will cause them harm or pain. I recently was told some information that will cause my girlfriend great emotional distress, and I don't want to tell her. However, I feel extremely guilty when I see her because I feel like I am lying to her. I am not sure what the right thing to do is. A: Well, without knowing the specifics of what you were told and what kind of information you are talking about, let me give

Q: My son is 7 years old and currently attending a public school in the first grade. It has been obvious to my husband and I for some time that he has some kind of learning disability and some behavioral issues, but he has never been diagnosed with anything, and we aren't really sure what to do. His teacher tells us that he isn't reading at a first -grade level and that his actions in class not only prevent him for learning but disrupt the entire classroom environment. We don't really know what to do or where to begin. I haven't received any support from the school in this situation, so right now I am just frustrated. I don't want my son to fall behind, but I think he needs help. His dis