Pets. Loveable. Frustrating. All-consuming? I seen this more often than I would like. Person A has dog (or cat or bird or whatever). Person A finds themselves in a committed relationship with Person B. Person B does not like animals. Person A is torn. They love their Ruffy, but they also kind of dig Person B. What to do, what to do. Why should you have to choose? If you are an animal lover and you had your best friend before you got in this semi-serious relationship, the incoming significant other needs to understand that your pet is your companion. If they are an animal hater, that is likely to cause some serious dissention in your relationship. I would hate to see relationships fai

“The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel” Directed by John Madden Review by Malcolm Maclachlan and Tony Sheppard Malcolm: I loved the Newsweek headline for their review of “Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”—“Eat, Pray, Die.” Not that there was a lot of praying going on. Actually, I don’t remember any. Maybe it should have been “Eat, Love, Die,” (though that sounds a little Darwinian) because the aging Brits in this predictable but charming little tale remain obsessed with their love lives, but not much concerned with any afterlife they’ll soon experience (or not). To back up, the story involves a group of down-on-their-finances British retirees who decide to stretch their money by settling at a hotel i

I think it is safe to assume that everyone reading this is either a teenager or used to be a teenager. Do you ever look back at your 16-year-old self and feel like punching yourself in the face? I was a late bloomer. I made it to 17 incident-free, but seriously... what was I thinking? It breaks my heart to see parents with errant teens, saddened by their choices and seemingly helpless to correct them. Blank stares, slammed doors, late nights. Teenagers. It breaks my hear to see teenagers – angry, frustrated and unable to effectively communicate with the ones who brought them into this world. I'm not telling you it is easy, or that you can fix it, or, more importantly, that it is anyone’

What separates a shallow relationship from a lifelong commitment? Checking in. OK, I am being super facetious when I say that, because it really can't be separated that way. However, something that I have always appreciated about my husband, even when we were dating, is that he checks in. I, in turn, offer him the same courtesy if I am out of town or going to be working late. By “checking in," I do not mean a 30-minute conversation about everything he did that day or an exact itinerary while he is away. Situation: My husband is out of town for work or screwing around with his buddies. Check-in: Text that says, "Hey wife, hope you had a good day, love you!" Yes, my husband calls me "wi

There are a number of lame decisions that you have to make about your life when you break up with (or divorce) your significant other. One of the worst decisions to be made is how you deal with mutual friendships. Most couples have other "couple friends" or mutual single friends that are part of a group. Well, how awkward is it (particularly if the break-up was messy) to continue to hang out with your mutual friends if your ex is there as well. I suppose it is only awkward if you make it awkward, but consider how your friends must feel. Where does their allegiance lie? Are they trying to figure out how to split their time between the two of you separately, but equal? When they host a part

Romantic relationships are hard. Whether you are in a brand new dating relationship, a lifelong marriage or some kind of awkward in-between stage, there is no easy relationship. If it is easy every day, you may not be doing it right. Real relationships take focus, dedication and time. There are so many contributing factors to the health of your personal relationships, such as work, family, finances, personalities, history, and the list goes on and on. However, looking these challenges in the face while you succeed at your relationship is rich satisfaction. You came, you saw, you conquered. Dating is rough. Can't say I have done it in a long time, but I am very close to those who are. I t

Q: I have been dating my girlfriend for nearly six months. About four months into our relationship, I finally introduced her to my mom. They seemed to hit it off and had a lot to talk about, but shortly after that my mom confided in me that she didn't like her. She had a whole list of things she didn't like about her, from the way she did her makeup to the fact that she worked for herself. I think my mom is being ridiculous, and I am really happy. However, my mom is my mom and I don't want to alienate her. Not sure how to work through this issue! A: Well this situation sucks doesn't it? My answer is simple: What your mom thinks has merit, and I suggest you take a close look at your girlf

It is a big decision. Moving in together, making meals together, paying bills together. Moving in with your significant other might be the best decision you have ever made... or it might break you up. The single most difficult decision to make when moving in together? How do we split the bills? Rent, phone bill, cable, groceries and on and on and on. You need new furniture, appliances and a bigger bed. The expenses add up, which is tension enough, but you need a solid plan (before you make this decision) about your finances. There are a few methods to consider: 1. Combine your funds in one account and pay from there. Let me be the first to say that I do not recommend this option unless

I recently had a conversation centered around the idea of hopelessness and suicide. The conversation was dark, depressing and eye opening. I am always amazed when I speak with someone who does not believe in depression, at least in the clinical sense. They feel it is only in a person's mind and if they would just...DO something about it, it would be all right. Unfortunately, depression is real. It is a living, breathing part of your everyday life if you have fallen under the spell. You cannot escape it without a dedicated plan that often includes counseling and medication. What I find myself asking is, "Why do some people seem susceptible to depression when others do not?" I have never

Q: My daughter is supposed to start kindergarten this upcoming fall. Because of that, we wanted to enroll her in a part-time pre-school this spring so that she can get used to playing with other kids and taking direction from other adults. The first week of class was a nightmare. The teacher told me after the first day that my daughter screamed the entire half day. She also said it was normal, and it would get better. Well, it didn't. She has been an emotional wreck every day that we have taken her to class. I am not sure what to do. She needs to learn to make this work, but she is a little young to be so emotionally traumatized. Where can I get help? A: Wow, I am so sorry that you and

It is February. The month of love. The month of loneliness. Pretty much everyone falls into one of those categories, but I want to remind you that single does not mean alone. Make a point to connect with a friend this Valentine's Day. After all, love is not just intimate, but a feeling we have for people who matter to us. Reach out and schedule coffee, dinner, or a fun night in. Forget gifts. They don't matter in the face of time spent together. Don't get depressed about being alone, but remember to be thankful for what you have, for who you have. Write a love letter to yourself. Remind yourself who you are and what makes you thrive. Make a list of things you have done and things you h

Q: My mother is in the last stages of aggressive cancer, bedridden and nearly comatose from the pain medication. We haven't always had a good relationship (actually we have never had a good relationship), but the thought of losing her makes me realize how much I really do love her. I know she has sacrificed a lot for me in her life, and now I feel like I lost out on something special, a relationship with her. I am having a really hard time coping with her dying and us never having the chance to talk about this. My brother tells me that I just need to let it go and not bog her down with my feelings. I don't know what to do. A: I am really sorry to hear about your mom and the pain she is e

Maybe it is just me, but I am so thankful that Facebook was not around when I was in high school. The drama that it can cause is ridiculous. Even people in their late 20s and 30s succumb to the drama Facebook provides. "You checked in at where with who? I thought you were home sick! You told me you don't even like that girl. Liar. We're through!" "I get so mad at all those girls who comment of my boyfriend's wall. Don't they know we're together now?" "Who is that guy who always ‘likes’ your photos and comments? Do I need to pay him a visit?" "Why are you still friends with your ex? Now he can see everything we do!" Please raise your hand if you have been a part of or heard of situatio

Q: Just like everyone else I know, I made certain new year’s resolutions that revolve around bettering the person I am. I was really excited about some of the changes I was going to make. Now, a week later, I get the impression my boyfriend isn't as excited about the changes. They don't really have anything to do with him, except I am changing the person I am, and he doesn't like that. We have only been together a year, and I am uncertain about our future. However, I am not willing to give up these amazing changes I am making just for him. Am I making the wrong decision by blowing off his feelings? A: In this situation, there are a couple things you need to consider about him and about

Are you among the millions who made a New Year’s resolution or resolutions under the title of self-improvement? A new diet, a new job or a new outlook on life in your future? Research shows that more than 100 million Americans make resolutions every January but only one out of five actually stick with it. Good for those 20 million people. For the rest of us, consider the resolutions you have made in the past. Did you stick to them? Why not? (Yes, I AM assuming you didn't.) I can only imagine that you set out to change your life. You planned on losing 25 pounds, finally snagging that job you always wanted, and you planned to quit smoking. All. In. One. Year. I mean, since those things a

My long lived neighbor and companion, Timothy Murray, adopted his first dog "Maxwell Smart" from a shelter none other than God's SPCA, Church of Christ. Un doubly he has never needed him more each day. After two years with this special companion; the wired haired terrier and him has never felt more an item. It was no non-sense considering an adoptive pet request program offered by the little church of Rio Linda. Evidentiary, the Pet Programs were suitable for SPCA torts reform and due process; because it was easy to cleave to dog repair and salvation. I welcome those opinions of who maintain advertising still is needed in this system to keep a steady and consistent draconian function. A

Q: I am a struggling college student with more bills than income. Christmas is always a struggle for me because I don't have the funds I want to dedicate to present-buying. My family completely understands this, and we often choose names to limit the number of people you must buy a present for. However, my boyfriend’s family (we have been together several years) does not do that, and they are known for their extravagant gift-giving. The past few years that I have participated in their family Christmas, I typically end up over-extending myself on the gifts and putting more than I want to on my credit card. This year I don't want to do that, but it is embarrassing to show up with cheap gif

Instead of question-and-answer this week, I am writing a little editorial about spending the holidays with immediate and extended family. For most people, this season is one of the few times a year we see many members of our extended family. Different interests and personalities collide in what turns out to be a magnificent display of diversity, or a horrific explosion of arguing and hurt feelings. What kind of family do you have? If your family comes together in a harmonious fashion and shares fun, laughter and love, then you are a very blessed person. Remind yourself how thankful you ought to be for the people you love, who love and care about you. If your family falls into the other

Q: My husband and I recently had a baby (five months ago), and now I am looking to go back to work full time. I have looked in to the cost of care for our son, but the prices are outrageous. Meanwhile, my mother-in-law has offered to care for our son every day that I am working. While this seems like a perfect and inexpensive solution, I am not wild about how my mother-in-law handles my son. My husband and I have a very particular way we handle our son, and my mother-in-law doesn't always follow our directions when she watches him. I am afraid that without consistency he will be confused as he grows older about what is and is not right, what he can get away with, and he will waiver from t

Q: I am in an abusive relationship. It isn't ALL the time, but it does happen sometimes. I know the obvious answer would be to break up with him and leave, but I don't really feel like it is that simple. On one hand, he has made references to being really angry if I ever leave him. On the other hand, we do have a good relationship most of the time. I dream of being in a happy relationship, but I don't know how to create one. You know that saying, "I have come too far to go back now"? That is how I feel. I don't know if I will ever have the courage to stand up for myself and walk away. A: Let me just first say that you have never gone too far to walk away from someone who does not respe