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Thursday, May 24, 2012
Experiences in Homelessness Part 4: Transition to Independant Living
by peer blank, published on March 8, 2011 at 8:06 PM
Storyline: Homelessness
I was moved into yet a third house, and ironically, the issue was identical to that of the previous house situation, only different faces. After a few months of living in this second house, a random 'emergency house meeting' was called one day. All of us residents were called into the living room by two case/house managers and the program director. I sat, totally oblivious; confident that it had nothing to do with me, as I was the only compliant resident among the group.
When the program director asked us what issue had caused this emergency meeting, one of the clients, out of the blue, falsely accused me of several things I did not do, including having a crank pipe in my room. I was totally floored, but did well to remain calm and silent. When the program director asked me if this were true, I very simply stated, "no". Then the rest of the residents all confirmed the accuser's false accusations, calling me a liar.
I remained silent, and my case manager directed me to pack up my belongings. We went outside and I spoke very candidly to him of how I was innocent, they were lying, and expressed not only my willingness, but insistence on taking a drug test, as most of their false accusations were that I used drugs.
The irony to all of this was they were the ones openly using drugs in the house, and I got tired of trying to get staff to do their job enforcing this supposed 'no drug and/or alcohol' policy when I lived at the previous house. Because of this, I chose say nothing more to staff of any drug and alcohol issues, as it did no good anyhow. And again I was moved to a third house.
So, is this what people mean when they talk about the impossible maze that the homeless are forced to navigate through, should they decide to access these so-called 'homeless services' to get themselves off the street? I believe a book could be written on the impossible maze of navigating through the homeless service providers.
I had tried to navigate through similar such services before this particular incident, and it is nonsensical. Honestly, I don’t know how or why it worked this time, other than my abstinece from drugs and alcohol.
Something that may be of interest to readers as well is that peoples' tax dollars are going to fund programs such as these, and this is what their tax dollars are producing. Are taxpayers getting cheated out of their money, if it is funding programs that are run like this? Perhaps some of the blame may be placed among our local elected officials whose responsibility it is to deal with these complexities surrounding the various homelessness issues and seek solutions to them.
In conclusion, I am no longer homeless, and have been home-free for some ten years now. I have been clean and sober over nine years and love it. My hope is to continue my sober journey to my death. It is the best high I have yet to experience.
Just under five years ago, I serendipitously landed a job working for a homeless service provider organization in Sacramento. I consider myself, though not formally educated in social services, to have the street education equivalent to a PHD in the field, as there doesn’t seem to be many formerly homeless working in it. It would be nice if there were more. I struggle to make ends meet everyday and there isn’t a lot of money in this field, but I love the work so Im sure I'll continue despite the pay.
The programs that serve homeless have a lot of good people working for them, and maybe a lot of not so good people as well. Such is life.
I believe in the work I do. I believe that just caring enough about a homeless person to hear their story can make all the difference, and I live for that today. I know if there is hope for me, there is hope for any homeless person, despite any unjust opposition from society that the homeless may face.
Im not trying to persuade people who have lost hope in the homeless to believe otherwise. Nor am I trying to convert people who would rather the homeless situation were swept under the rug, or demand that people care. I care. There is no point in trying to change a person's mind. I am telling my story so that maybe someone can get some insight into the life of homelessness, and from it hopefully aid in finding better ways to address the homeless issues we face.
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I do appreciate your kindness though, assuming it is authentic.
Thank you.
I may not agree with you politically, but the fact that you are clean and sober deserves kudos.
My first experience with Sac Press was reading the recent article on rangers rousting homeless along the river.
The debate on that article is intense! There were a few views i felt to be quite 'anti homeless' and I saw an opportunity to release my warrior archetype. This has also been my first exposure to people with such a seemingly strong contempt for the homeless. It is all quite compelling to me!
newguyinsac, you are one I saw who seemed to have some strong contempt for the homeless, and I was up to argue with you and the others my opposing views.
I will accept your kudos, and respect your views to the best of my ability. I also will attempt to understand your point of view as well.
I will also exercise and express my opposition, if I feel as though your views are an attack at my personal character.
I have been homeless, so I know a little something you who have not been homeless will never know, until you experience it for yourselves.
Until such time, I will question your views on homelessness, whether you are right or wrong, and will defend even the homeless most deserving of ill will, at least until justice is served to this multi-marginalized population.
If I am ever at fault of attacking yours or anyone's character, which I do at times as you may see by some of my others comments, please bring it to my attention, as, newguyinsac, I'm confident you will. :)
Thank you.
As well as the nightmare, I know the joys of such a life. I do not envy the poor. I would not choose to go back to being homeless. If I had to, I know what it takes to survive and would be somewhat resourceful, though the streets change every year and its been some time since being last I was homeless.
One thing most homeless people despise, is pity. That likely will not change over time. Thank you for your input.
Your series, here, is splendid. I am hopeful that you've achieved more than you intended: Putting in the minds of many what the truth of the circumstance of being homeless is. The story of each homeless person is unique, but we are each confronted by the boggling homeless-services bureaucracy, which is two parts bad for every good and salvific thing it does.
I praise to the skies your Warrior Spirit, courage and perserverence! [And, yowza, your excellence at the writing craft!] Keep it up, O Mighty brother! I know you are no longer homeless, but I hope to meet you out on the streets, or along the avenues in my journey, always in progress. Always, always.
It is a great good that you've shone some light of truth in a situation that is darkened by the bathos coming from many charities, and journalistic laziness of the professional scribes who never leave the desk in their office [and, thus, mostly bellow into the echo chamber of homeless myths].
Right on! Oh, and write on, too!!
-- Homeless Tom
What is frustrating for me is that people may read my story and see it as testimony that homeless services are successful and not in need of reform.
Or that homeless people remain homeless because they are drug addicts and alcoholics that choose not to receive help for their addictions.
Drugs and alcohol kept me alive long enough to stumble into the help I needed, and I would not be alive today otherwise.
I despise the ignorance, contempt and hatred people have of and for the homeless.
I know there is hope for all the homeless, and my heart is with you bro!!
Thank you for your support. I gotchyo back friend!!!!
I say "benefit most of us" because some, as illustrated by certain comments on your series, seem more inclined to pass simplistic judgment on you and on homeless people in general than they are to open their minds and hearts to your stories, struggles, and pain. I surmise that some coldly assign blame and sanctimoniously preach "personal responsibility" as subconscious defense mechanisms against the precariousness of their own life situations. I suppose it can be comforting when faced with the growing financial uncertainties and tribulations imposed by today's faltering economy to blame the homeless for their plight because it lends reassurance, however false and fleeting, that we can avoid homelessness ourselves come whatever may, when the fact of the matter is that many of us are just one proverbial paycheck away from homelessness or extreme hardship ourselves through no glaring fault of our own.
And even when people fall into homelessness because of "poor choices" and addictive behaviors, what some of their detractors fail to do is seriously ask themselves WHY people make these choices and succumb to these behaviors and then follow these inquiries to their root biological, psychological, and social explanations. Such inquiries are stopped dead in their tracks by reflexive platitudes about "personal responsibility," and empathy for those who struggle mightily to rise above their past mistakes is quashed by banal bromides such as, "You just gotta pull yourself up by your own bootstraps instead of expecting or even asking for decent help from others."
Again, thanks, Sonny, for your articles, and thanks, Tom Armstrong, for calling my attention to them through a recent post in your outstanding "Sacramento Homeless" blog. And, for what it's worth, Sonny, I don't think you have anything to apologize for in any of your responses to comments on your articles. I think you've done a remarkably good job of responding to narrow-minded provocations with civility, clarity, and intelligence. I doubt that many of us would have fared as well.
All the best to you with your job and your life.
You really hit the head on the nail. Seems like you have a good understanding of these things. From my point of view, being homeless myself, I was very disgusted with some peoples' reactions to the Rangers rousting homeless off the river article that was published a few weeks ago.
Though I had often felt many people were discriminant towards the homeless during my life on streets, that was my first look at openly expressed contempt for homeless by people. This contempt is fear-based, as you have pointed out.
Thank you for reading my article. I would love to do more non-biased articles on different homeless issues that are written from a formerly homeless perspective, in attempt to shed more light on a misunderstood marginalized population.
Thanks again for being supportive!!!!