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Friday, February 10, 2012
Sacramento Rage
by Tamara Dorris, published on October 30, 2009 at 4:55 PM
Storyline: Interviews
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Having lived in Sacramento for nearly 40 years, it’s not like I’ve never read about or seen news coverage on crimes in our town. However, it seems that recent years are introducing a new level of crime that arises from rage.
The recent Sac State slaying, where Scott Hawkins was allegedly beaten to death (possibly with a baseball bat) by his own roommate, Quran Jones, speaks volumes. The boys shared a dorm room, went to college and seemed to get along fine. The victim, Hawkins, is reported to have been slightly autistic. The other roommates said that they were completely shocked by the ordeal. In a photograph, the alleged killer, Jones, looks like a clean-cut, serious student. What caused Jones to explode in such an unexplainable fit of rage to where he beat a less-able boy to his untimely death?
Last week, down the street from where I live, on the 5300 block of Marconi, a woman, Regina Leigh Grant, age 47, and her son Gerardo Verde, age 23, allegedly stabbed a neighbor to death. Can neighborly disagreements so easily escalate that someone pulls out a knife and stabs someone to death?
This month, Tyrone Adam Palmer was convicted of second-degree murder for running a car off the road that had three teenage girls in it on Winding Way and Barrett. One of the girls was killed, one still remains comatose (after two years), and the other escaped with two broken legs. Apparently, Palmer was disturbed when the girls, upon leaving a party, threw an egg at his car.
Palmer reportedly jumped in his vehicle and chased the girls down, eventually running them off the road into a telephone pole. My own daughter was supposed to go to the same party the girls had just left from. Who would think that a silly, mischievous prank (egging a car), would result in such a degree of rage that three young lives would be so dreadfully affected?
Rage knows no region. There is no household, office building or neighborhood that is safe from its reach. What can we do to curtail the impact?
According to Andrea Lambert, Sacramento-based Licensed Marriage, Family and Child Therapist, “There is not enough information available on how to express and release anger responsibly … we have a way to express sadness by crying … to express fear by trembling and shaking … to express love by a kiss, a hug, a tap on the shoulder. We have not been taught or shown how to express anger in healthy, responsible ways which is a feeling just like the others.” Lambert goes on to say, “So when anger is not being expressed, it builds and builds into rage and to be released so it doesn’t harm the body, it is expressed by violence.”
Lambert, who has worked with clients of all ages and all walks of life, acknowledges that there are healthy ways to express anger and states that there are various forms of therapy which are highly effective in supporting people to release their rage that might result in violent behavior.
It seems that Sacramento would benefit with a reduction in rage through education and awareness of this rapidly growing problem.
Sources:
KCRA News
(http://www.KCRA.com/news/21408837/detail.htm retrieved 10-26-09)
(http://www.SacBee.com/static/weblogs/crime/archives/2009/10 retrieved 10-25-09)
(http://www.SacBee.com/static/weblogs/crime/archives/2009/10 retrieved 10-25-09)
Personal Interview, Lambert, Andrea, LFMCC, Oct. 24, 2009.
Personal Interview, Marsha Smalley, Sacramento State University professor, Oct. 20, 2009.
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While I agree totally that "egging" does not deserve such an angry violent reaction, I don't believe that "egging" is a "silly mischievous prank." It disrespects other people's property, and is a form of vandalism. What happened to the girls was tragic and should never have happened! I'm not defending Palmer because he let his anger get out of control. That is inexcusable and being older, he should have known better. He is now paying the price for that.
BUT neither should the girls have thrown the egg or eggs to begin with. What if, after they realized that they had done wrong, they had just stopped their car instead of fleeing. What if he had stopped his car too and came over angrily cursing them. What if, at that time, they had called an apology out the window and offered to wash his car? Wouldn't that have calmed his rage--at least brought down the level?
Somewhere in their past they did not learn or their parents did not teach them that every act of misbehavior has a consequence. Nor did they learn that they nor anyone else can never predict the type or extent of that consequence. It is difficult to believe that this is the first time these girls misbehaved. How did they happen to have eggs with them when leaving a party? I doubt that they had just gone to the store for Mommy on the way home from the party. Only the parents know how many prior times they excused their daughters' misbehavior.
Any lessons to be learned from this needless tragedy?
To suggest that the girls should have pulled over when Palmer began chasing them down is utterly naive. If someone is pissed off enough to chase you, it's highly unlikely that they're going to be reasonable if you offer to wash the car. A person who gives chase is not looking for an apology; they're looking for revenge. Palmer certainly was.
Read my comment again. I made no suggestions as you misstate. I asked questions "what if' the misbehavior had been followed with civil behavior that they apparently were not taught. I am not suggesting that would have solved the dispute, but might it have?
Further, you have no idea unless you were in Palmer's unreasonably angry mind, whether his motive was revenge or not. Neither do you know how he would have responded to three young pretty girls who suddenly became docile and stopped to make amends. You only state your personal opinion of what Palmer would have done. No one knows that but you seem to feel that you are endowed with special knowledge to assert that his or anyone's unknown motivation in such generalized cases is "certainly" revenge.
Over and over we do know from experience that when civility is introduced into a hostile situation, the emotions and anger drop dramatically. Let's learn from that instead of defending obvious misbehavior.
He was in the process of stealing a travel trailer from the court that the girls drove into and stumbled into him in the act. They had no idea what he was doing, threw the egg, the chase started. He was chasing them in a stolen truck, the same truck that he used to chase someone with and run them off the road the week before.
So what does common sense say would have happened? Probably wouldn't have been a civil scolding. You espouse understanding the consequence of real world actions. Here's a pretty steadfast rule of survival through all of time: When you're chased; run.
I don't know any high school kid who hasn't done things like egging. It's a condition that is always going to be there. As you go further in life, most people learn not to throw eggs at things, or other actions that provoke. But nobody ever learned anything from doing everything right.
That kids will do these things is a fact of existence. No matter how much guidance is given it's going to happen. You know nothing about how the girls families raised them. You're a "blame the victim" person. Much more so than the other poster being a supposed apologist for the girls.
You are also right that I don't know how the girls were raised. but I have known and worked with thousands of teenagers over the years and you are definitely wrong that guidance makes no difference because teenagers will misbehave anyway. You are also wrong that I'm blaming the victims. I only pointed out the risks and consequences of misbehavior, something everyone should learn if they don't already know. So don't read things into what is not there because that also becomes part of the problem.